Anna's weekly email dated May 6

WOW!! I can not believe it that I've made it to my 5th week in the MTC!! It's
amazing how fast time has gone by!!! First off couple of things: MOM- I can't
call you on Mother's Day while I'm in the MTC.....we're not allowed to plus
there's not enough phones!! I do have a special card coming to you in the
mail.....however I will get to call my family while I'm at the airport before I
leave for Argentina in 4 weeks!!!  2. Laura - I don't even have your school
address at BYU.....how can I send you a letter??? Dear Elder it to me TODAY!!! I
want to write to you badly my only sister!!

I have a confession to make..on Wednesday all of sudden I
REALLY missed my family......I felt sad......pero
(but) the longer I'm here the more amazed I am at how I'm changing as a
person......I'm going through this GRANDE personal transformation right
now......It's REALLY hard....there are a lot of things I'm realizing and honestly
I have NEVER been so dependent on the Lord as I am right now! There's no way I
could make it through this without fully relying on the Lord.

One of the Elders in my District with whom I'm friends
actually had an interesting perspective on my situation ---
he said that he was actually jealous that I was going through this right
now b/c when I get to the field I will be amazing & able to focus on serving the
people!! I was really surprised to hear that and actually really humbled......I
hear Satan constantly whispering in my ears that I can't do this almost
constantly.....even my Teacher Hermano Zirkle who is already translated
(remember....he's one of the 3rd Nephites) said that Satan has these bounds
wrapped around me and that he knows that I'll be a powerful missionary and
doesn't want me to succeed.

I've been desperately praying for the Lord to help
me handle this.....somehow after every prayer I utter.....I receive an answer
the next day through a class/teacher who talk about the very same thing....I'm
learning to recognize the Spirit in different ways that I NEVER noticed
before.....I have promptings & thoughts and it'll be something I never
thought about before and suddenly I have this understanding!! Spanish is BEYOND
hard for me but last night at the TRC my companionship & had to teach the 1st
lesson in Spanish for the first time and amazingly it went REALLY well!! The
pretend investigator said he felt the spirit strongly from us!
Looking back at where I was to where I am now is insane!!! I'm still behind in Spanish but
everyday I get better.....My teacher Hermano Zirkle said that you don't have to
understand grammar to speak Spanish.....good thing b/c grammar had always kicked
me in my rear end.

To close, I have this little story to share from my Teacher
Hermana Clegg who talked about how she almost didn't serve a mission b/c she
was never comfortable telling people what to do, but one day an impression came to her.
It was around Christmas and she was walking up to her
beautiful home that was all decorated and she could see how beautiful her Mom
had decorated the table with all this amazing food.......it was beautiful and
smelled delicious.  As she walked up, she saw a Woman sitting
in the dirt eating cockroaches (sounds weird I know but just
wait) and my teacher was like NO!! Don't eat that!! It's disgusting!! The woman
refused to listen to her and said.....what are you talking about???? Leave me
alone!!

Hermana Clegg said she realized that what we have it soooo AMAZING &
beautiful!! And what the world feeds you is CRAP.....(like the cockroaches) It
will never nourish & sustain you.......We have the
restored gospel of Jesus Church......if people knew what we knew.....how would
this world be different!! Anyway I'm out of time!! I love you all!! PLEASE keep
sending letters!!! MOM, DAD and Johnny I will mail you some copied pages of my
journal!! Those pages really express what I'm learning & feeling.
LOVE HERMANA ANNA SCHMIDT